Love. The last 3 days have been focused on love. Mentions of the word abound. But what is love? Is it one thing, that fits nicely in a box? No, like most of the good things in life, it is not. But I am really feeling convicted about love, and my ways of showing and interpreting love.
According to Merriam-Webster, love is:
a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (maternal love for a child)
(2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers
(3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates>
b : an assurance of affection <give her my love>
2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>
3 a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love>
b (1) : a beloved person : darling —often used as a term of endearment
(2) British —used as an informal term of address
4 a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as
(1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind
(2) : brotherly concern for others
b : a person's adoration of God
5 : a god or personification of love
6 : an amorous episode : love affair
7 : the sexual embrace : copulation
8 : a score of zero (as in tennis)
Wow. That is a lot. Love is a BIG thing in our world. We use the word all the time. For instance, Sadie and I LOVE this new coffee creamer I found. I LOVE my new earrings. But, is it the kind of word to throw around? And I think it is great that we have a holiday to celebrate it. However, I strongly feel that it is something we need to address every day. Just like we should feel the awe that Jesus died for us every day, the amazement that God sent him to us as a baby in a manger, and the thankfulness for all of our many blessings.
However, I do watch television, movies, and I am involved in social media. I realize that this doesn't happen for everyone. Not everyone has a spouse who makes every day feel like Valentine's Day, or are blessed with children who are generally sweet and good-hearted. Not everyone is blessed to have had an awesome mother, and two more women who you like they are your own, to still be a "Daddy's girl" at 40 years old, to have had step-dads that accept you and your family as their own. Not everyone knew the love of 4 great-grandparents, a plethora of aunts and uncles, and a multitude of cousins. That is not counting the friends who were made in elementary school, and are still there today.
There is a lot of hurt in this world, and I have decided I don't want to contribute. I want to be a person of love. I have started a Proverbs 31 Online Bible Study again, and I love it (see, I did it right there - without even thinking about it!). (Now, I must admit, I am behind, but I am saving all of the emails!) We are reading iKeep It Shut: What to Say, How to Say It, and When to Say Nothing at All by Karen Ehman. It is fabulous! I am learning so much.
Some truths this book has pointed out to me so far are:
1) Our words are powerful, and they have consequences. Well, this is like a slap in the face. I found out this morning that I said something to one of my dearest friends over 8 months ago, and hurt her horribly. I didn't intend to do it. I was sick at the time, and evidently, very thoughtless. So, for 8 months, this friend has suffered. And I have suffered too, because there has been a rift in our friendship, and I didn't know what caused it. Well, now I do, and to you whom I hurt, I apologize. I promise I never intended my words to hurt you.
2) Our tongue is a dangerous weapon. In James 3: 5-6 (HCSB), it says "So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among the parts of our bodies. It pollutes the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is set on fire by hell." I mean, how many times do we spout off, and then wish we could take it back? Um, for me...about 10 times a day! I am sarcastic, and that is not always a good thing. In James 3: 7-8, it says, "Every sea creature, reptile, bird, or animal is tamed and has been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison." Yes, every animal can be tamed - but not MY tongue. This is a fact I know personally. James goes on to tell us, in verses 9-12, that a well cannot produce both sweet and bitter water, just like our tongue. We cannot spew words of praise one moment, and words of hurt the next. That doesn't work. And it doesn't show Jesus's love.
3) The words that come from out of our mouth have to come from our hearts first. Now, I have heard (and believed) this for years. If you say something jokingly that is hurtful, there is a grain of truth in there somewhere. It is how you feel in your heart. In Luke 6:45, Jesus HIMSELF says, "A good man produces good out of the good storeroom of his heart. An evil man produces evil out of the evil storeroom, for his mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart."Basically, words are not accidental, and in the above mentioned episode of hurt feelings, I must have had some bad feelings in my heart. And it hurts to say that, but I will admit it, and ask forgiveness.
4) How I use my words can often be traced back to the time I spend (or don't spend) with God. That is pretty self-explanatory. I need to spend time with God in order to be attuned to the Holy Spirit when He taps on my heart to tell me to be quiet. (Oh, if God would just use Duck Tape on my lips I would be much better off!)
Those 4 life truths were revealed to me in Chapter 1! And Chapter 2 got even better...
I am a person who makes her living by talking to people. I talk all day, every day. But I need to learn to listen, and to keep my mouth shut. I don't want my words to hurt the people I come in contact with daily. I want my husband and children to think of loving words. I want my friends to hear loving words. I want people to think of me, and love and kindness. And I believe that is what Jesus wants from us. When I spew words of unkindness, words of hatred, or words of judgement, it is coming from my heart. And I need to work on that.
So, to anyone I have hurt with my words, I am so sorry! Pray for me, and my ability to keep it shut when I should!
Blessings to you all...
Jolie
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