The Not-So-Good Day

It was not terrible. It was not horrible. It was not "not good." It was not very bad. But it wasn't great either.

I debated on posting this or not, but I said I would post the good, the bad, and the ugly. And the last 24 hours haven't been "the good." I wouldn't say they were the bad or ugly, but not good.

A little background - Dan and I had to divide and conquer yesterday, as I had us double-booked for part of the day. So, he took Jon Carter and headed to Health Works to learn how to be a healthier parent. I took Sadie, and headed to New Albany, for her to take a test. I started off good. I ate an Atkins bowl for breakfast, took my water, and made myself a protein shake for mid-morning. Yay!!! It worked out great. I had even taken an extra snack, but didn't need it.

After returning from Sadie's test, we met up with the boys and went to lunch. Mexican. D'Casa. (Oh, how I love D'Casa!) I did good there too. I ordered fajita steak with cheese, and some avocado slices. I didn't think it would fill me up, but it did. I was impressed. FYI - I did not TOUCH a chip!

Then - on to the next appointment. A birthday party at Health Works. It was great fun catching up with old friends and family. :) I walked away during the cake, and didn't do anything but drink water while I was there.

After that, I came home and was hungry. I mean - I crashed, and I went from "OK" to "too hungry" very quickly. So, I had a boiled egg white and some sandwich meat. Well, at this point - I had pretty much met my carb quota for the day, and it was only 5 pm. But I was good, and I had a plan for dinner. Then, we decided to make an impromptu road trip to see friends. This, I had not prepared for, and didn't take anything with me. On the way home, we needed to feed the kids, and our options were either fast food or convenience store food. So, Dan opted for fast food.

Well, I did not react well to that. In retrospect, I think I was "hangry" to quote my friend Joannah. I had gotten hungry physically, and I was facing a bad case of "head hunger" as well. It was overwhelming, and I panicked. I borrowed Dan's earbuds, and tried to listen to my audiobook, but it was not helping at all. So, I moved t my Praise music. That was it. I blasted it for about 30 minutes, as I cried and prayed for strength. This helped, and I finally calmed down. And, I did not starve to death in the 45 minutes it took to get home. Imagine that!

Today, I have had no energy. None whatsoever. I did good to take a shower. My head hurts, and I am just drained. I think it is that my body is starting to run low on the stored carbs, and is having to use fat/protein for fuel. I did some research today though, and I now have a plan for eating more proteins, and keeping the "hanger" at bay. I did cook several things today to have in the refrigerator for snacks/lunches/leftovers. (I have a teachers meeting until 6 tomorrow). I have learned that planning is essential.

I also read some very inspiring chapters in Made to Crave today. They were very fitting, as they dealt with "horrible, no good days." I am feeling more refreshed now, and I am ready for bed. I had a bad day. I lived. I hit a low, and I prayed, and God provided comfort and insight. And some awesome ideas for planning ahead. I know this isn't the only low day I will have. And I know that I am not alone going through this. I have each of you, I have Dan and the kids (who are so very, very supportive), and I have God.

Now, please don't think I am having a pity party. (I did, and it is over.) I am rejoicing tonight that God was there. This is one time that I am sure there would only be one set of footprints in the sand, and they are not mine. Please continue to pray for me, as my time is getting closer.

Blessings! Have a great week!

Permissable, But Not Beneficial

Hello, dear friends! This post is a little different for me. As a part of my weight loss journey, I have been praying. I know, I know - Praying to lose weight? Really? Does God care about that? Well, yes. I believe He does. So do a lot of other women. You see, I am participating (1st time ever) in an Online Bible Study through Proverbs 31 Ministries. We are reading a book called Made to Crave.

Well, last summer, when I decided I thought I wanted to lose weight, I bought this book on my Nook. And I read the first few chapters. It was great. I loved the idea. I CLUNG to a verse I read:

I Corinthians 10:23 “Everything is permissible,” but not everything is helpful. “Everything is permissible,” but not everything builds up. 

Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. Hmmmm.....So, that Snickers is permissible, but is it beneficial? Probably not. Those delicious cookies my sweet friend brought me from Rosie's....They are permissible, but are they beneficial? No, not for me. It totally changed my way of looking at things. I was no longer "denying" myself anything. I was allowing myself to choose. And did I always make the best choice? Uh - NO!!!! Did I always make the wrong (unhealthy) choice... No. I started making better choices, and then I was #EMPOWERED!!!! If I could resist once, I could do it again. 

On the flip side - I would say "It is permissible for me to sit here and watch Judge Judy and Dr. Phil all afternoon, but is it beneficial?" No. "It is permissible for me to stay home from the gym because it is cold, but is that beneficial?" No. So, just like I said before, I started making healthier choices. 

Now - Please understand, this was not easy, nor was it done by myself. I did not have the strength to follow through, but God provided it. He has provided me with opportunities for wellness. (My job pays for me to be a member of our Wellness Center). He has provided me with the courage to attend classes I never thought I would be able to do, and to go alone. He has provided me with the physical strength/motivation to push myself. He has provided me with a supportive family. He has provided me with a wonderful Christian friend who teaches one of my favorite classes. He has provided Christian fellowship and friendship with others in those classes. So, the least I can do is to say, "I know this is permissible, but is it beneficial?

So, months after purchasing the book, I see on Facebook, of all places, that there is going to be an OBS on this book, and I couldn't resist...Because, you see, God provided it. He provided it now, knowing that I need it before the surgery. He provided it now, to remind me that the surgery is not a "quick fix," but only a tool. And if I continue to crave improper things, I won't be successful with my weight loss. He provided it now, so that I may ask others to pray for me as I go through this journey.

"All things are permissible, but is this Bible study beneficial?" Yes. Yes a thousand times! 

Praise God!!!