Fatherly Love

I haven't REALLY been happy with my last few blog posts.  I have really wanted to post some deep, spiritual insights, however, I have had none. I don't want this site to be about me, or my kids, or Dan. I really want this site to be about God, and the work He is doing in my life through this weigh loss journey. But lately, I have just done good to get up and go to work. If you work in education, you will understand this. May just sucks the life right out of you! MCT2, IEPs, dismissals, parties, Awards Days, Field Days, end-of-year special education testing...Needless to say, I have been a tad bit overwhelmed. Add to that the physical stress of eating only 30g of carbs a day, and trying NOT to drink Diet Pepsi...Wow! Let's just say we are lucky my head hasn't exploded yet, or that I am not wearing one of those nice white vests that ties in the back!

Anyway - I digress. Spiritual truths or revelations.

So, today I had to go to have my pre-op bloodwork/testing done at the hospital. I sat down and opened my Nook app, but felt guilty because I haven't been reading the Bible like I should. So, I reluctantly closed that app, and opened my Bible app. It opened to the "Verse of the Day" for today's date. This is what I read...

No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the fruit of peace and righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Hebrews 12:11 (HCSB)

That was like a revelation to me. No discipline seems enjoyable at the time. Ain't that the truth! Let me tell you, 30 grams of carbs a day is discipline. And it really isn't enjoyable to me. But, look - the Bible tells me that "discipline yields the fruit of PEACE and RIGHTEOUSNESS." Peace and righteousness. Who doesn't want that? Will only eating 30g of carbs give me peace? I doubt it. Not me, nor my kids, nor especially my sweet Dan, who thinks I have been a little "testy" lately. No, controlling my carbs won't give me peace, but the DISCIPLINE will. Discipline is something I lack in several areas of my life, not just food. But, here God's word telling me that if I embrace the discipline, it will eventually give me peace and righteousness. Who wouldn't want that? 

So, after reading that verse, and being touched by it, I moved on to read the chapter. When the page opens on my phone, the heading says "The Call to Endurance." Verses 1 and 2 say: 

Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God's throne.

Let ME run with endurance! I don't have a cross to face, only a diet. I don't have a cross to face, I only have to have DISCIPLINE where my eating and working out is concerned. How blessed am I? That is NOTHING compared to what Jesus gave for me! So what, I would MUCH rather give up what God is asking me to than to face what Jesus faced.

The next section (verses 3-13) fall under the heading "Fatherly Discipline." Well, I wish that wasn't a phrase that we use at our house, but with a 9 year old and an 11 year old, "fatherly discipline" is discussed a LOT. These verses say:

For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, so that you won't grow weary and lose heart. In struggling against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And you have forgotten the exhortation that addresses you  as sons: My son, do not take the Lord's discipline lightly or faint when you are reproved by Him, for the Lord disciplines the one He loves and punishes every son He receives. Endure suffering as discipline: God is dealing with you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline - which ALL receive - then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Furthermore, we had natural fathers discipline us, and we respected them. Shouldn't we submit even more to the Father of Spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time based on what seemed good to them, but He does it for our benefit, so that we can SHARE IN HIS HOLINESS. No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the fruit of peace and righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore strengthen your tired hands and weakened knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated, but healed instead.

God uses discipline to help us grow, so that we can SHARE IN HIS HOLINESS. We are disciplined by our earthly fathers, because they love us. So, imagine how much God loves us? God loves me as HIS child. I just tried tonight to explain to Sadie about the love of a parent, but we all know - you just can't understand it until you are there. And GOD feels that way about ME! So, that being said, I'll take the discipline. Because, during the past 12 months, God has given me so much! He IS leading me towards peace and righteousness. He is teaching me discipline in one area of my life, that is carrying over to other areas. Areas that will help me become a better Christian, and to witness to others.

The time is drawing closer. Only 1 more day of solid food, then 3 days of full liquids, then 1 day of clear liquids. In 6 more wake-ups, I'll be heading out to NMMC, ready to take the next "exit" on this journey to a new me. I think I am ready. Much more ready than I was in February. "All things work for good for those who know Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:28)

Blessings!